Sunday, July 18, 2010

Personal selfishness

I've been thinking about selfishness a lot lately. My own. It is making me more than a little uncomfortable. I've been thinking about how easy it is to accuse someone else of selfishness, and also how easy it is to excuse my own selfish behaviors.

We have a beautiful home in an idyllic setting... it's way more than what is needed to comfortably house my family. Is this selfish? Is it selfish to have frivolous things like jewelry that I treasure? You could feed a lot of people or send a lot of children to school for the amount of money that paid for my treasured bracelet.

Is it selfish to want another child when we have five already? Five who each have their own particular needs... some more major than others, but all important to that person and our family. What about taking a child from half way across the world, away from his family and culture... is that selfish?

Or spending a couple of thousand dollars on surgery for our beloved little dog?

I don't know the answers. I am going to try to find them.

4 comments:

Cindy said...

I have a lot of those question too...

Becky and Naing said...

I think adopting from a 3rd world country makes you more aware of the huge needs that are world wide.
I think about a sports player that makes millions of $ a year for playing a sport, why can't that money go to fund aids research...
If you are a person who gives back in whatever way that works for you than you aren't selfish. Do you help others, do you see a need and try to find a solution? Those are all questions we should ask ourselves.
Adopting a child from another culture is not selfish, since the child doesn't have a chance of being adopted in that culture. It is life changing, but not selfish.

Charity Roach said...

Paula,
Interesting topic... we have been discussing this a LOT at our home lately. Like why do we need this much space? Can't the kids share a room? If we downsized we could bring more home....

It's very hard to strike a balance. I find excuses for the things I "need" and easily point out to others what they don't need and I define as "selfish". Bringing another child into your home though... that is NOT selfish. Just the opposite.

Bringing another child home is not easy, it's not fun, it's full of difficulty and emotion. For the most part there is none of it that can be defined as selfish. You are GIVING a child a home. A mom. A life. A future. A chance to hear the gospel. It does not take away from the life of your other children... it adds to their life to see the unselfish act of their parents. It adds to their life to see you embrace and love the orphan!

Everyone has to decide for themselves, but to me, this is not selfish. Just the opposite.

Charity

Kristen said...

You are blessed... not selfish! You have a lovely home that shelters a lovely family. You share your life and love with so many... and that home... if I needed a place to stay would be open to me - I know that! Frivolous jewelry would be selfish if you kept all you had to yourself. You do not!

Right now you are battling big decisions! Keep praying... find out if what you are desiring is what He desires for your family. It might take time... listen to His voice. Love you friend!