Eagle party

This is why we live where we do...
we get to look out our back windows and see this.
Isn't that beautiful?

Where is my supersuit?

I seem to know a lot of women who have supersuits in their closet... they run marathons, organize charitable benefits, drop everything to pack up and move to third world countries, start non-governmental organizations to help the impoverished, maintain actual real full-time jobs, have homey welcoming houses, renew themselves spiritually with Bible devotion every day, prepare delicious healthy meals, knit sweaters or write witty and nationally recognized blogs all while caring for at least a half a dozen high achieving, challenging and active children.

I feel like such a slacker. I don't own a supersuit.

Most days, I think I'm doing great if I get two or three errands done, make dinner and get the twins in bed without too much yelling. I really have to limit myself on what goals I set for any given week because I get so easily overwhelmed. One of my favorite blogs had a challenge to rock your attachment challenged child every day for 15 minutes for 30 days... no way was I going to publicly commit to that; I knew it had real potential to be another thing to "fail" at!

I just want to know where the supersuit store is located... I could sure use one.

Pictures I love

I'm going to start sharing some of my favorite old pictures once a week or so. This one is from a vacation in 2004 when my big kids weren't quite as big... Kenneth was 15, Emily was 13 and Anna was 10. I would sure like some of that warm Caribbean sunshine now.

Lightening my load

When I was in Ethiopia, we saw many women loaded down just like the one pictured here. They are carrying firewood they gathered on Mount Entoto to take down the mountain and sell. All this work for a dollar or so a day. She carries this load because she has to in order to make a living.

I believe I have mentioned before that I am a fretter by nature. I carry huge mental loads with me all the time. Right now, I am burdening myself with negative thoughts about everything that could go wrong with our adoption.

I sat down today to do my Bible study, which this week covers chapter 40 of Isaiah. The theme of the verses we are studying is that we need to focus on God and put our trust in him over false idols, and one of the questions asked "what idols do you put before God in your mind, emotions and time?"

Wow. The answer came to me so quickly it was almost scary... the internet. Now, I don't think the internet is evil. But I do think that it's ability to help us find instant "answers" can be misleading. In my case, my anxiety over adoption issues has caused me to constantly check various internet groups and websites to see if there were any new rumors or tidbits of information for me to obsess over. Not good. Not healthy. In fact, more times than not, participation in most of these groups left me feeling out of sorts and cranky and filled with fear and doubt.

I firmly believe that God has called our family to adopt in Ethiopia... so why in the world would I let these groups convince me otherwise? Unlike the Entoto women, I can choose to lighten my load.

I had my laptop sitting right next to me on the kitchen counter. I went over to my group page and deleted myself from several different groups and hit "enter". The feeling of lightness and freedom I felt from that one simple click was amazing. I have resolved today to listen to God more and the internet less.

But I'm not giving up my blog anytime soon. :)

Snowy days, the high cat and a special surprise

I know I'm going to end up kicking myself later when I'm stumped for a post topic, but I just happened to have three great pictures to share today and I'm excited to put them out there right now. I can be impatient like that.

My original post for today was going to feature Tom and the twins enjoying some father-daughter bonding time while building a snowman. The girls were really excited to do this and we had some actual double-digit temperatures yesterday for them to play in... above freezing in fact, fortunately for Tom.

Then while I was getting the camera to upload the photos, Harry the cat started meowing at us from his favorite high perch. I have a theory that two cat households divide the furniture and other assorted territories into the "high cat" and "low cat" areas. Harry is our high cat. Our other cat, Lucy, would never venture here.

And the final photo for today, an extra special surprise via air-mail... a letter from the twins' birth mom, with her new post office box address in Ethiopia and a couple of baby pictures of the twins! Here they are in their youngest pictures yet; about eighteen months old. It brought a lump to my throat. We love you, Roman.

Two in one

Attachment challenged and strong-willed. Times two. No wonder I'm so tired all the time. Suggestions, anyone?

p.s. Don't be fooled by those angelic faces. Cuteness is a survival tactic.

We're going!

The tickets are purchased. We are going to Ethiopia in five and a half weeks for our court date! I can't wait to meet my son!

My friends from Because Every Mother Matters and doma will be traveling in Ethiopia that week too; I am hopeful that we can meet up in Addis Ababa!

It IS a good thing

I know I've been a posting slacker.

Truthfully, I have been in kind of an emotional slump about the adoption, and I didn't know what to say without sounding whiny. I guess I'm just going to go ahead and whine, so faithful readership (all five or six of you), bear with me.

I'm getting pretty excited about bringing my new son home. For awhile, I was distracted by other things going on at our house, but I've reached a point where I can kind of breathe and think about the future... we're getting a son! And I'm excited! And yet...

Why do I have this vaguely guilty notion about the whole thing? Well, I'll tell you why... because of the onslaught of anti-international adoption writing I have come across. Even in the so-called online "support" groups, it seems like someone is constantly lamenting the poor integrity of international adoptions, or the corruption, or the greed or the suffering of birth families... the list could go on and on.

Yes, those things exist. Way more than they should. Yes, every happy adoptive family comes at the loss of a birth family. But no, I don't think that makes all international adoption suspect. I think international adoption can be, and in many cases is, a good thing. I can't help but notice that frequently, the ones who decry the adoption process the most are people who already have their adoptive child home. It was fine for them, at the time they adopted, but now... sigh. It just bothers me.

I don't know anyone who wants an unethical adoption. I certainly don't. I learned a lot from our first adoption. I knew which agencies to avoid at all costs, and which ones were generally good agencies. There is no perfect agency. I knew questions to ask, things to look for, and I'm satisfied that the waiting child we are adopting has accurately been portrayed.

I also feel like a lot of people think my husband and I have just plain gone crazy. We have our hands full with five pets and five kids and Tom is just buying a small manufacturing business and why the heck would we do this adoption thing again? At our ages?

I worry a lot about orphans and widows and poverty in Africa, particularly in Ethiopia, a country I have grown to love. I know that international adoption isn't going to solve the world's orphan crisis, or eradicate poverty. I believe that God put Ethiopia in my heart to show me that I can help make a difference there. I am equally certain that my calling from God is to nurture children, and that this child was put in our path for a reason. I am excited to welcome him home and to begin to help him heal his heart and love him as my son. I am excited for our family to experience the joy of a little brother. Won't you be excited for us, too?

An evening out

This evening, we went to dinner at the aptly named Ethiopian Restaurant with our friends, Coree and Roger and their three daughters Ellen, Libby and Emma. I used to coach Libby and Emma in gymnastics. They were having an out of town visitor, another of my former proteges, Skye.

Here I am posing with two of my favorite little gymnasts,
Skye and Libby:

And here, Skye and Emma amusing the twins
by pretending to be horses:

I can only hope that the very kind restaurant owner was equally amused. Thankfully, we were the only patrons still in the dining room at this time. :)

Whip my hair back and forth

Candace and Sarah got a much needed trim on their hair yesterday. After the cut, stylist Jesus asked me if I wanted him to blow it out... my initial reaction was "heck, no!" There were two reasons for this: 1) I love their curls, and want them to love them, too; and 2) there is no way I can duplicate this style at home... just thinking about the potential for future breakdowns when I am unable to do so at their whim. In the end, however, I caved; but only after Jesus explained to them that this was special holiday hair for New Year's Eve and it would be gone once we washed their hair.

I have to admit, it was funny watching them run their fingers through their hair and toss their adorable little heads around. I will be ready for my little curly heads to reappear though.

Merry Christmas 2010!

Here are the kids before Mass on Christmas Eve: not a very good picture, so I tried to spruce it up with some fancy edging.
Just go with it.

Candace and Sarah were very much into the unwrapping of presents this year.

Court date!

And the magic date is...
March 4, 2011. It seems like a long way off, but hopefully it will be here before we know it. Spring will be just around the corner!

Tidings of great joy

And suddenly there was a multitude of the heavenly host with the angel, praising God and saying: "Glory to God in the highest and on earth peace to those on whom his favor rests."

When the angels went away from them to heaven, the shepherds said to one another, "Let us go, then, to Bethlehem to see this thing that has taken place, which the Lord has made known to us." So they went in haste and found Mary and Joseph, and the infant lying in the manger.

Behold, magi from the east arrived in Jerusalem, saying, "Where is the newborn king of the Jews? We saw his star at its rising and have come to do him homage."

And the Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us, and we saw his glory, the glory as of the Father's only Son, full of grace and truth.

Waiting... and happy birthday

Waiting, waiting, waiting...

Although it hasn't been long by international adoption standards, it seems like we have been waiting forever for Thomas. It's really only been five months, but for that entire five months we have known who our little boy is; we have seen his face in two blurry photos. Only two photos... we had dozens of the twins after five months and we brought them home six months after referral.

I know this is perhaps the one pitfall of adopting a child from the "waiting child list". Almost everyone agrees that the wait is harder after you have a referral, and with a waiting child, you have that referral from day one.

Today is our new son's birthday. He is four years old. I know that the birthday is just a guess, and I also suspect that Thomas is perhaps older than four. But this is the day we will celebrate his birth, and right now we think he's four. And we're missing it.

What would really make me happy would be to receive word that we have a court date. I'm praying for that this week.

The Nativity

I love nativity sets, and I have quite a few. I like to have them around the house at Christmas time to remind everyone about the real reason for the holiday. Plus, they are beautiful!

Here is the small display in our dining room:

And here is one in our family room:

(Note: this picture had to be substantially cropped to eliminate the clutter residing on the next shelf down!)

Here is a close-up of my new favorite. I bought it in Addis Ababa on my recent trip to Ethiopia.


These are my favorite decorations for the Christmas season, and it makes me happy to place them out each year. Some of them have special sentimental value, some don't; some came from far away and some came from around the corner. Some can be played with... but most can't!

I love them all. :)